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Typos
Jul. 12th, 2009 | 06:53 pm
I have gotten some flack at work this past year for typos so I look at all publications differently now.
I've already notified the admin.
And I just saw another typo in an article... but I'm not gonna get crazy. I'll focus on ads and sponsorship recognition typos and post here.
I've already notified the admin.
And I just saw another typo in an article... but I'm not gonna get crazy. I'll focus on ads and sponsorship recognition typos and post here.
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finishing that thoguht
Jun. 25th, 2009 | 04:12 pm
mood: 
rushed
I started the last entry about not being able to have conversations, brushed with my fascination of using willpower to rearrange the neurons in your brain, release transmitters, etc., and then...
What I meant to say is that I'm not really motivated to make those changes because that now conflicts with my need to be honest, no "make-up". (Although, in the literal sense I dye my hair --have just stopped by two weeks-- and wear mascara.)
I'm kinda proud of my decision to stop dying my hair. Wastes time and money and it confuses all psyches involved. Incorrect info going in means skewed output.
Man, I'm so ffffffaaassssst right now. I'd dearly love about six shots of whiskey... and maybe some cheese, like brie or OMG-- there is this awesome cheese called exploratore that's french, runny, and expensive. It's amazing.
What I meant to say is that I'm not really motivated to make those changes because that now conflicts with my need to be honest, no "make-up". (Although, in the literal sense I dye my hair --have just stopped by two weeks-- and wear mascara.)
I'm kinda proud of my decision to stop dying my hair. Wastes time and money and it confuses all psyches involved. Incorrect info going in means skewed output.
Man, I'm so ffffffaaassssst right now. I'd dearly love about six shots of whiskey... and maybe some cheese, like brie or OMG-- there is this awesome cheese called exploratore that's french, runny, and expensive. It's amazing.
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Just trying to write
Jun. 25th, 2009 | 12:30 pm
mood: 
bouncy
I really don’t know of anyone that I can have a pleasant conversation with. I can have conversations with people who have known me before, but they are not satisfying. Either they are uncomfortable or I am uninterested or we are just playing again what’s been said before. I feel like this should be “fixed.” I’m fully capable of changing my being. I believe someone can do whatever they put their mind to, and I’ve changed my personality several times before… always with the aid of a change of scenery and always slowly relaxing back to my natural inclinations. That’s something I hadn’t realized before when I touted the power of free will.
-------------
Today is –yet again—my fourth consecutive day of sobriety. I think I’ll make it because Alex has also committed to not drinking Sun-Thurs. It’s hard not to snack, watch TV, and drink when that’s what he’s doing. I’m just grateful when I can move it away from his desk and to the couch. I think he’s got a serious lifestyle problem, that being that he lives his entire life at a desk. Yeah, he shits in the can, but he eats, communicates, shops, etc. at his computer. I keep saying that we’ve GOT to start eating at the table, but when we do, he just reads his book. I feel so ignored. I’m sitting there eating my dinner, staring out the window or at the wall, thinking, what’s the point?
------------
My boss and I had a lovely conversation about this morning about our need to create a self-sustaining lifestyle and our fear that government is too powerful. He’ll retreat when the people rise up. I don’t think the people will rise up. I just want to escape, and I believe it is imperative to do so BEFORE scary scary things are required of US residents and/or citizens. That was right after I railed at him because…
Well, he had this really early pre-business day meeting so I was going to be sweet and prep his financial reports for the lunch board meeting (he had a two board call, too, so was just trying to help out). This is not something I normally do. Anyhoo, I found entries/transactions MONTHS old that would have gotten me FRIED if I had handed out that report. He is calm, cool, and has an established rapport with our community so he can get away with anything. I’ve gone to that exact board meeting before and gotten eaten alive over a financial status that’s been true for a decade and explained many times. (I didn’t know about it because I don’t usually go to the bod’s for that group so I was terribly worried something scandalous was about.) He had negative expenses and a line item under miscellaneous that was $9 Vendor Compensation (upon further research it has to do with sales tax).
Well, there I go contradicting myself... I had a pleasant conversation. Life seems so bleak at times.
-------------
Today is –yet again—my fourth consecutive day of sobriety. I think I’ll make it because Alex has also committed to not drinking Sun-Thurs. It’s hard not to snack, watch TV, and drink when that’s what he’s doing. I’m just grateful when I can move it away from his desk and to the couch. I think he’s got a serious lifestyle problem, that being that he lives his entire life at a desk. Yeah, he shits in the can, but he eats, communicates, shops, etc. at his computer. I keep saying that we’ve GOT to start eating at the table, but when we do, he just reads his book. I feel so ignored. I’m sitting there eating my dinner, staring out the window or at the wall, thinking, what’s the point?
------------
My boss and I had a lovely conversation about this morning about our need to create a self-sustaining lifestyle and our fear that government is too powerful. He’ll retreat when the people rise up. I don’t think the people will rise up. I just want to escape, and I believe it is imperative to do so BEFORE scary scary things are required of US residents and/or citizens. That was right after I railed at him because…
Well, he had this really early pre-business day meeting so I was going to be sweet and prep his financial reports for the lunch board meeting (he had a two board call, too, so was just trying to help out). This is not something I normally do. Anyhoo, I found entries/transactions MONTHS old that would have gotten me FRIED if I had handed out that report. He is calm, cool, and has an established rapport with our community so he can get away with anything. I’ve gone to that exact board meeting before and gotten eaten alive over a financial status that’s been true for a decade and explained many times. (I didn’t know about it because I don’t usually go to the bod’s for that group so I was terribly worried something scandalous was about.) He had negative expenses and a line item under miscellaneous that was $9 Vendor Compensation (upon further research it has to do with sales tax).
Well, there I go contradicting myself... I had a pleasant conversation. Life seems so bleak at times.
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Airport Poem - Version I sent my Schmooky
Jun. 16th, 2009 | 02:33 am
mood: 
accomplished
Getting 750 Soldiers Through Airport Security
Young men from Dallas are
being deployed from Gate B18.
Bodies flow along making a
round rhythm, bodies almost without
exception manufactured handsome, large,
and glowing. I see each set down
his bag, square his shoulders,
and look up, his hands mindlessly
presenting a practiced performance:
a leather tongue flips open, teeth
are pulled aside, and his belt
finally snakes off in one long snap!
He stomps one foot, then
drops the other boot.
Next time it's played a little
differently, showing a sliver of
hip, a firm glossy oblique--
And all with conscious oblivion.
Their belt-ripping builds in
many wavelengths overlapping
at unexpected amplitudes, an
irregular but unified chant.
It arouses an assembly-line
of sighs and blushes. The wives
look spent when it's finally
done, and the last one laces his boots.
-------
First of all, this actually happened. I'm jus' a 'lil ol' country girl from Mississippi, and I had HUNDREDS of hot young men parading before me, carelessly ripping off clothes. I wasn't hiding that I was watching either.
If you video-taped this, it'd be horribly boring to watch, but I feel like the moment should be recorded as I felt it.
Young men from Dallas are
being deployed from Gate B18.
Bodies flow along making a
round rhythm, bodies almost without
exception manufactured handsome, large,
and glowing. I see each set down
his bag, square his shoulders,
and look up, his hands mindlessly
presenting a practiced performance:
a leather tongue flips open, teeth
are pulled aside, and his belt
finally snakes off in one long snap!
He stomps one foot, then
drops the other boot.
Next time it's played a little
differently, showing a sliver of
hip, a firm glossy oblique--
And all with conscious oblivion.
Their belt-ripping builds in
many wavelengths overlapping
at unexpected amplitudes, an
irregular but unified chant.
It arouses an assembly-line
of sighs and blushes. The wives
look spent when it's finally
done, and the last one laces his boots.
-------
First of all, this actually happened. I'm jus' a 'lil ol' country girl from Mississippi, and I had HUNDREDS of hot young men parading before me, carelessly ripping off clothes. I wasn't hiding that I was watching either.
If you video-taped this, it'd be horribly boring to watch, but I feel like the moment should be recorded as I felt it.
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Airport Poem - Revision 2
Jun. 16th, 2009 | 01:35 am
mood: 
tired
Soldiers Through Airport Security
Young men from Dallas are
being deployed from Gate B18.
Bodies flow along making a
round rhythm, bodies almost without
exception manufactured handsome, large,
and glowing. I see each individually
set their burden down, square their shoulders,
and see God,
.............his hands mindlessly
presenting a practiced performance, (6)
a leather tongue flips open, teeth are pulled aside,
his belt finally snaking off in one long snap.
He stomps one foot, then
drops the other boot.
Next time it's played a little
differently, showing a sliver of
hip, a firm glossy oblique--
And all with conscious oblivion.
Their belt-ripping builds in
many wavelengths overlapping
at unexpected amplitudes, an
unpredictable but unified chant.
It arouses an assembly-line
of sighs and blushes. The wives
look spent when it's finally
done, and the last one laces his boots.
Problems with it still:
(6) What I mean is they make it look easy. Still anyone is going to read masturbation. If you're ever a girl and try to get some guy's belt off, it's AWFULLY hard! ;) Plus, the alliterative phrase is hard to delete.
(9) I want to get across an eeriness that there are so many people one after the other doing the same thing and looking alike, but the objects of my attention are the individuals. I don't think I'm doing that.
Young men from Dallas are
being deployed from Gate B18.
Bodies flow along making a
round rhythm, bodies almost without
exception manufactured handsome, large,
and glowing. I see each individually
set their burden down, square their shoulders,
and see God,
.............his hands mindlessly
presenting a practiced performance, (6)
a leather tongue flips open, teeth are pulled aside,
his belt finally snaking off in one long snap.
He stomps one foot, then
drops the other boot.
Next time it's played a little
differently, showing a sliver of
hip, a firm glossy oblique--
And all with conscious oblivion.
Their belt-ripping builds in
many wavelengths overlapping
at unexpected amplitudes, an
unpredictable but unified chant.
It arouses an assembly-line
of sighs and blushes. The wives
look spent when it's finally
done, and the last one laces his boots.
Problems with it still:
(6) What I mean is they make it look easy. Still anyone is going to read masturbation. If you're ever a girl and try to get some guy's belt off, it's AWFULLY hard! ;) Plus, the alliterative phrase is hard to delete.
(9) I want to get across an eeriness that there are so many people one after the other doing the same thing and looking alike, but the objects of my attention are the individuals. I don't think I'm doing that.
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Time to Straighten Out My Mind
Jun. 16th, 2009 | 12:31 am
mood: tired
( self-talk and babble )
[Error: Irreparable invalid markup ('<lj-cut="now,>') in entry. Owner must fix manually. Raw contents below.]
<lj-cut text="self-talk and babble">Lots of things are wrong.
1) Dieting but gaining weight.
2) Drinking too much.
3) Letting my inner demons beat too much up on me.*
4) Not being as productive or creative, even to the point where I don't clean the house each Saturday and my garden is terribly overgrown.
5) Letting work interfere with time outside of work (see #2 and consequently #1; also see #3 and #4).
6) Not praying at all.
7) Drinking too much. It bears repeating and rounds us out to a nice deadly sins sort of list.
*It is accepted practice to put a period at the end of bulleted fragments. I know because I had to look it up at work last week when I re-designed a membership application.
How am I going to separate myself from duties I must perform (work, cleaning, gardening) so that myself is healthy and available for duties I will perform (writing, sex, cooking)? I'm as much of a hermit as I can possibly be. I DO NOT enjoy anyone's company because I've gotten too used to being however I like so I can't play nice. That means either they start being mean back to me or just take me being mean. Either of which sends my heart plummeting. I'm not proud of myself.
Separating myself is not the answer. Hasn't been the answer for three years. I must somehow take these pieces of psychological trash into my hands-- remove them or make something of them. Preferably in a way that doesn't involuntarily bubble out in a baritone <i>Death! Death! Death!</i> and follow with a whining girl-child's "God, let me die..."
That's the thing! That's what's wrong. This: pieces of psychological trash in hand |
involuntarily bubble out in a baritone <i>Death! Death! Death!</i> and follow with a whining girl-child's "God, let me die..."
"|" is my new favorite key on the keyboard
I've started a data-oriented blog that was supposed to make me feel productive. My husband is quite proud. I feel like a fat failure. I did half of an exercise DVD today. I have a feeling that's what's keeping me up. Maybe I would function better is a survival mode of operation... but that's precisely what I was fleeing! It worked out so well in the beginning. Then "they" discovered that I was capable and hard-working, set me to more projects and tasks with which I had little experience and did not deal well, and I feel flat on my face. Not to anyone here. Just a group of cutting-edge professionals.. about 400... around the world. The cream of which--the board-- was privy to more face-falling. I can say it's not my fault. I was basically told to serve these people while my boss enjoyed the profits with very loose-handed management-- but isn't that what I'd prefer?
Why can't things be simple? Because then I won't be the best.
If you're alone in the world (as in my hermetic and apocalyptic fantasies) then you can be as lazy and dumb and naive as you like and still be the best. All that matters is survival until you begin comparing, which feeds jealousy and pride. I thought I was over this. I thought I was ABOVE pride. ;)
Tina: I think we're working through some of your issues.
Tina: Yes, Tina, go on. There's a million tons of trash to sift through here. Salvage what you can.
Tina: Yes, Tina; you're right.
I'm giggling like crazy now!</lj-cut>
<lj-cut="Now, I'll attempt to finish a poem begun last September.">
Here is a poem I conceived last September:
Belt, Shoes, ???
Yougn men from Dallas are
Being deployed from Gate B18.
???flow, on and on???
Almost without
Exception handsome and large.
????
string their belts ???
seduc*, showing a little
Hip, firm glossy oblique--
And with conscious oblivion.
Imagine an assembly-line
Whorehouse, where each is
Treated to one last fuck,
Before "They're Off!"
To more important ??things??.
I feel spent when it's finally
done, the last one laces his boots.
Here is me attempting to work on it tonight:
Belt 'n Shoes Strip-tease (2)
Young men from Dallas are
being deployed from Gate B18.
Each(7) flows along in a round
-house rhythm (1)almost without
Exception handsome, large, and
glowing. I see each(7) man
set their burden down, square their shoulders,
and see God. Their hands mindlessly
presenting a practiced performance. (6)(8)
His belt finally snaking off in one long sweep, (3) (5)
overlapping like waves, (5)
like chanting a devilish song. (5)
He stomps one foot, then
jerks off the other boot. (6)
Each(7) time it's played a little
differently, showing a little
Hip, firm glossy oblique--
And all with conscious oblivion.
Imagine an assembly-line
whorehouse, where each(7) is
treated to one last fuck, before
"They're Off!" *bang*
to a more important duty. "bang" 4)
I feel spent when it's finally
done, the last one laces his boots.
My critique,
(1) evoke assembly line because of their uniformity and the conveyor belt for luggage, but do not mention it. The reader will feel clever for making the connection. Make the connection clear. Say something that means it seems endless, mindless black abyss pleasure before the soft culmination at the end
(2) what I'm hearing here is the cash register sound effect from <I>Are You Being Served?</i>: medium medium HIGH-- low This is a description of the volume, importance, and length of each syllable.
(3) witness my difficulty describing how incredibly seductive it is for a man to pull his belt off
(4) I like the dual meaning of bang. War. Sex. Powerful extremes. Am I assuming the reader is so dumb he/she/it needs repetition?
(5) I don't think I'm doing a very good job of conveying this sound. SSsss... like a snake or a zipper. Lots at once. Forbidden.
(6) I don't mean to evoke masturbation. I'm not one who finds watching either sex masturbate stimulating so it is not a truthful expression of my response to this event. I must change this out.
(7) I use 'each' too much. I need to convey the multitude of similar individual parts of what I'm seeing without this icky icky repetition. I need to describe grains in a mound of sand, but make it sexy.
(8) I go from "them" to "him" here. Am I making this purposefully and meaningfully?</lj-cut>
1) Dieting but gaining weight.
2) Drinking too much.
3) Letting my inner demons beat too much up on me.*
4) Not being as productive or creative, even to the point where I don't clean the house each Saturday and my garden is terribly overgrown.
5) Letting work interfere with time outside of work (see #2 and consequently #1; also see #3 and #4).
6) Not praying at all.
7) Drinking too much. It bears repeating and rounds us out to a nice deadly sins sort of list.
*It is accepted practice to put a period at the end of bulleted fragments. I know because I had to look it up at work last week when I re-designed a membership application.
How am I going to separate myself from duties I must perform (work, cleaning, gardening) so that myself is healthy and available for duties I will perform (writing, sex, cooking)? I'm as much of a hermit as I can possibly be. I DO NOT enjoy anyone's company because I've gotten too used to being however I like so I can't play nice. That means either they start being mean back to me or just take me being mean. Either of which sends my heart plummeting. I'm not proud of myself.
Separating myself is not the answer. Hasn't been the answer for three years. I must somehow take these pieces of psychological trash into my hands-- remove them or make something of them. Preferably in a way that doesn't involuntarily bubble out in a baritone <i>Death! Death! Death!</i> and follow with a whining girl-child's "God, let me die..."
That's the thing! That's what's wrong. This: pieces of psychological trash in hand |
involuntarily bubble out in a baritone <i>Death! Death! Death!</i> and follow with a whining girl-child's "God, let me die..."
"|" is my new favorite key on the keyboard
I've started a data-oriented blog that was supposed to make me feel productive. My husband is quite proud. I feel like a fat failure. I did half of an exercise DVD today. I have a feeling that's what's keeping me up. Maybe I would function better is a survival mode of operation... but that's precisely what I was fleeing! It worked out so well in the beginning. Then "they" discovered that I was capable and hard-working, set me to more projects and tasks with which I had little experience and did not deal well, and I feel flat on my face. Not to anyone here. Just a group of cutting-edge professionals.. about 400... around the world. The cream of which--the board-- was privy to more face-falling. I can say it's not my fault. I was basically told to serve these people while my boss enjoyed the profits with very loose-handed management-- but isn't that what I'd prefer?
Why can't things be simple? Because then I won't be the best.
If you're alone in the world (as in my hermetic and apocalyptic fantasies) then you can be as lazy and dumb and naive as you like and still be the best. All that matters is survival until you begin comparing, which feeds jealousy and pride. I thought I was over this. I thought I was ABOVE pride. ;)
Tina: I think we're working through some of your issues.
Tina: Yes, Tina, go on. There's a million tons of trash to sift through here. Salvage what you can.
Tina: Yes, Tina; you're right.
I'm giggling like crazy now!</lj-cut>
<lj-cut="Now, I'll attempt to finish a poem begun last September.">
Here is a poem I conceived last September:
Belt, Shoes, ???
Yougn men from Dallas are
Being deployed from Gate B18.
???flow, on and on???
Almost without
Exception handsome and large.
????
string their belts ???
seduc*, showing a little
Hip, firm glossy oblique--
And with conscious oblivion.
Imagine an assembly-line
Whorehouse, where each is
Treated to one last fuck,
Before "They're Off!"
To more important ??things??.
I feel spent when it's finally
done, the last one laces his boots.
Here is me attempting to work on it tonight:
Belt 'n Shoes Strip-tease (2)
Young men from Dallas are
being deployed from Gate B18.
Each(7) flows along in a round
-house rhythm (1)almost without
Exception handsome, large, and
glowing. I see each(7) man
set their burden down, square their shoulders,
and see God. Their hands mindlessly
presenting a practiced performance. (6)(8)
His belt finally snaking off in one long sweep, (3) (5)
overlapping like waves, (5)
like chanting a devilish song. (5)
He stomps one foot, then
jerks off the other boot. (6)
Each(7) time it's played a little
differently, showing a little
Hip, firm glossy oblique--
And all with conscious oblivion.
Imagine an assembly-line
whorehouse, where each(7) is
treated to one last fuck, before
"They're Off!" *bang*
to a more important duty. "bang" 4)
I feel spent when it's finally
done, the last one laces his boots.
My critique,
(1) evoke assembly line because of their uniformity and the conveyor belt for luggage, but do not mention it. The reader will feel clever for making the connection. Make the connection clear. Say something that means it seems endless, mindless black abyss pleasure before the soft culmination at the end
(2) what I'm hearing here is the cash register sound effect from <I>Are You Being Served?</i>: medium medium HIGH-- low This is a description of the volume, importance, and length of each syllable.
(3) witness my difficulty describing how incredibly seductive it is for a man to pull his belt off
(4) I like the dual meaning of bang. War. Sex. Powerful extremes. Am I assuming the reader is so dumb he/she/it needs repetition?
(5) I don't think I'm doing a very good job of conveying this sound. SSsss... like a snake or a zipper. Lots at once. Forbidden.
(6) I don't mean to evoke masturbation. I'm not one who finds watching either sex masturbate stimulating so it is not a truthful expression of my response to this event. I must change this out.
(7) I use 'each' too much. I need to convey the multitude of similar individual parts of what I'm seeing without this icky icky repetition. I need to describe grains in a mound of sand, but make it sexy.
(8) I go from "them" to "him" here. Am I making this purposefully and meaningfully?</lj-cut>
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300-500 Calorie $1 Meal Blog Launches Tonight
Jun. 14th, 2009 | 03:57 pm
mood: accomplished
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Alcohol, TurboJam, Cleaning
May. 28th, 2009 | 12:33 am
mood: 
awake
Hmmm... let's start with an alcohol diary:
Sun May 17 - 0 (eat what I want including 1/3 of an apple pie, but don't drink)
Mon May 18 - 0 (first day back tracking my nutrition)
Tues May 19 - 0
Wed May 20 - 7oz vodka; 1oz whiskey [75g alcohol] (normal drinking)
Thurs May 21 - 0
Fri May 22 - 17.5oz white wine; 1oz whiskey [62g alcohol] (frightful day at work)
Sat May 23 - 8oz white wine [22g alcohol] (Party at my house, possibly had some champagne and forgot to track...)
Sun May 24 - 4oz navy rum; 7oz white wine [56g alcohol]
Mon May 25 - 5oz red wine (one year anniversary; I turned down champagne.)
Tues May 26 - 0 (Day 1 antibiotic)
Wed May 27 - 0
Thurs May 28 - ?
Fri may 29 - ?
Sat May 30 - ? (Day 5 antibiotic)
Sun May 31 - ?
Mon June 1 - ?
Tues Jun 2 - ?
Wed June 3 - ?
Thurs June 4 - ? (Last day of antibiotics)
I have to say I'm pretty damn happy about that. How does that compare to anyone else? Better than usual for me, at least. Tuesday I started on antibiotics. It doesn't have any warnings against alcohol, but a great excuse not to drink. We have a 40th birthday party Friday, then the weekend, then I'm off on Monday. Those four days are not promising. There is an unopened bottle of Cook's blue label in the fridge from our anniversary. We have a touch of vodka, 1/4 box of white wine or less, and 1/5 of navy rum in the house.
I think (and I've not always kept such good records) that if I make it four consecutive days, it will be the first time since November 2007.
Walked down to the library to check out TurboJam REMIX after I found out that my National Aerobics Champion workout only burned 236 calories in thirty minutes. That was around seven. Maybe at eight I did TurboJam (an amazing 246cal in thirty minutes for all that extra effort). Ate some split pea soup. Played on the 'puter. Showered, cleaned master bath, tidied kitchen, decided on and completed a beauty routine, read books in bed with love-bunny until 10:30P.
Laid there until 11:30P. This morning, I found myself confronted with empty spice containers that fit in the lazy susan-like spice spinner so I found some almost empty ugly big plastic commercial containers and set them out with the glass spice shakers. So tonight, I filled those up, marveled at which commercial containers could be recycled or not, topped off a few others, sorted out the seasoning cabinet above the spice spinner, made an offering of unused gadgets (on the kitchen table waiting boo-approval), and got on Facebook/LJ. I plan on prepping one of those gadgets, an OXO Good Grip mandolin, for warranty repair. Of course it was a gift to Alex, and I broke it...
I wonder if I'll get tired and how I'll feel tomorrow. It's been a long time since this has happened. Ah-- my leg is looking better. No more oozing, less inflamed. The skin is peeling off quite nicely. Still looks horrid.
Sun May 17 - 0 (eat what I want including 1/3 of an apple pie, but don't drink)
Mon May 18 - 0 (first day back tracking my nutrition)
Tues May 19 - 0
Wed May 20 - 7oz vodka; 1oz whiskey [75g alcohol] (normal drinking)
Thurs May 21 - 0
Fri May 22 - 17.5oz white wine; 1oz whiskey [62g alcohol] (frightful day at work)
Sat May 23 - 8oz white wine [22g alcohol] (Party at my house, possibly had some champagne and forgot to track...)
Sun May 24 - 4oz navy rum; 7oz white wine [56g alcohol]
Mon May 25 - 5oz red wine (one year anniversary; I turned down champagne.)
Tues May 26 - 0 (Day 1 antibiotic)
Wed May 27 - 0
Thurs May 28 - ?
Fri may 29 - ?
Sat May 30 - ? (Day 5 antibiotic)
Sun May 31 - ?
Mon June 1 - ?
Tues Jun 2 - ?
Wed June 3 - ?
Thurs June 4 - ? (Last day of antibiotics)
I have to say I'm pretty damn happy about that. How does that compare to anyone else? Better than usual for me, at least. Tuesday I started on antibiotics. It doesn't have any warnings against alcohol, but a great excuse not to drink. We have a 40th birthday party Friday, then the weekend, then I'm off on Monday. Those four days are not promising. There is an unopened bottle of Cook's blue label in the fridge from our anniversary. We have a touch of vodka, 1/4 box of white wine or less, and 1/5 of navy rum in the house.
I think (and I've not always kept such good records) that if I make it four consecutive days, it will be the first time since November 2007.
Walked down to the library to check out TurboJam REMIX after I found out that my National Aerobics Champion workout only burned 236 calories in thirty minutes. That was around seven. Maybe at eight I did TurboJam (an amazing 246cal in thirty minutes for all that extra effort). Ate some split pea soup. Played on the 'puter. Showered, cleaned master bath, tidied kitchen, decided on and completed a beauty routine, read books in bed with love-bunny until 10:30P.
Laid there until 11:30P. This morning, I found myself confronted with empty spice containers that fit in the lazy susan-like spice spinner so I found some almost empty ugly big plastic commercial containers and set them out with the glass spice shakers. So tonight, I filled those up, marveled at which commercial containers could be recycled or not, topped off a few others, sorted out the seasoning cabinet above the spice spinner, made an offering of unused gadgets (on the kitchen table waiting boo-approval), and got on Facebook/LJ. I plan on prepping one of those gadgets, an OXO Good Grip mandolin, for warranty repair. Of course it was a gift to Alex, and I broke it...
I wonder if I'll get tired and how I'll feel tomorrow. It's been a long time since this has happened. Ah-- my leg is looking better. No more oozing, less inflamed. The skin is peeling off quite nicely. Still looks horrid.
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People-We-Never-See Cookout
May. 24th, 2009 | 09:22 am
mood: tired
My mother called Friday night (everyone I invited RSVPed Friday night) to say she and Lee were coming. I didn't send them an invite, but I remember that I put our Crawfish Boil as a repeating appointment on the family calendar the Saturday preceding Memorial Day. We explained that we wouldn't be doing crawfish this year, just dogs and burgers. Kinda unexpected, but it worked.
It was a bit weird. My mother and Mark's fiancee got along really well... I wonder if Mark made the connection: "This is my wife twenty years from now." All in all, I had a great time. We made pancakes for breakfast, got it together, Mom/Lee showed up early, ran out of forks/plates, and finally ended up sitting in the kitchen making fun of life. I had a burger and two glasses of wine, and felt really relaxed. Teddi just got her MBA. We're firing a lady Monday, and I hope to hire her. The pay is closer to $20k, though, and I think she could make $50k. Even if we only get her for a little while... *sigh* Want someone in that middle desk BAD.
It would be money for now and some awesome references for her. Hope she'll come.
Well, I ate too much cake. Other than that, too little protein yesterday. Just six glasses of water. BellSouth, AT&T, BNK, et al. (phone company employers of over 50 years) is trying to screw my Mamaw on her retirement. She's waited on retiring for half a year because they keep saying they need 90 more days to figure out her pay. Sending Alex in. Papaw had stomach ulcer surgery recently; Mamaw started taking arthritis meds; Dad had hemorrhoid surgery. Mom is still crazy and very overweight. Lee grew six inches and madea 29 on his first stab at the ACT. I told him to take the freakin' practice test and beef up on his science. He could easily get 34/35 I think. He still doesn't know if he wants to go to college.
I went to MSMS/college and got some "ideas" in my head. That's why my family isn't encouraging Lee to go. Stupid mother-fuckers... gotta love 'em I guess. Lee will get to see forty or fifty years of the future that they won't. He'll live in a different world. *sigh*
my poison ivy keep spreading and that leg that's the worst is swollen and has heat. I'm going to urgent care after Alex gets back from church.
It was a bit weird. My mother and Mark's fiancee got along really well... I wonder if Mark made the connection: "This is my wife twenty years from now." All in all, I had a great time. We made pancakes for breakfast, got it together, Mom/Lee showed up early, ran out of forks/plates, and finally ended up sitting in the kitchen making fun of life. I had a burger and two glasses of wine, and felt really relaxed. Teddi just got her MBA. We're firing a lady Monday, and I hope to hire her. The pay is closer to $20k, though, and I think she could make $50k. Even if we only get her for a little while... *sigh* Want someone in that middle desk BAD.
It would be money for now and some awesome references for her. Hope she'll come.
Well, I ate too much cake. Other than that, too little protein yesterday. Just six glasses of water. BellSouth, AT&T, BNK, et al. (phone company employers of over 50 years) is trying to screw my Mamaw on her retirement. She's waited on retiring for half a year because they keep saying they need 90 more days to figure out her pay. Sending Alex in. Papaw had stomach ulcer surgery recently; Mamaw started taking arthritis meds; Dad had hemorrhoid surgery. Mom is still crazy and very overweight. Lee grew six inches and madea 29 on his first stab at the ACT. I told him to take the freakin' practice test and beef up on his science. He could easily get 34/35 I think. He still doesn't know if he wants to go to college.
I went to MSMS/college and got some "ideas" in my head. That's why my family isn't encouraging Lee to go. Stupid mother-fuckers... gotta love 'em I guess. Lee will get to see forty or fifty years of the future that they won't. He'll live in a different world. *sigh*
my poison ivy keep spreading and that leg that's the worst is swollen and has heat. I'm going to urgent care after Alex gets back from church.
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Welcome to the Sociery of English Majors!
May. 22nd, 2009 | 07:57 pm
mood: calm
didn't get to pick blackberries
found out I'll be at home alone during vacation-- after SO MUCH planning
decided to drink
That sums up Wednesday. Thursday, I didn't drink. Friday, I made two consecutive stupid mistakes with our most sensitive client. The sort of mistakes that are seen by 400 people at their leisure (twice) around the globe. What do you do? C'est la vie. Hell come Tuesday.
So the blackberry patch was bush-hogged (sp?)... Trying to think of something to cook for my hungry baby.
Backtrack: So we decided not to spend money on vacation, which is the sensible thing to do, but then Alex went off and scheduled work appointments-- in the morning and afternoon. Just quick ones... but it's decidedly un-vacationlike. I'll be cleaning the house or working in the yard; I know. We'd do it anyway, but at least we'd be together.
By the way, see me Tina Ignatiev on Facebook.com for updated pix of the yard-- which is fuckin fantabulous. Well, on the most-improved scale anyhoo.
It's Friday. We ran out and got the quality beef at a good price before it was sold out. Then I went back to work, salvaged the situation, and came home to .. what? that thing I do but do less than my mother (thank God). And I have Alex. I spent most of the afternoon in a daze, and plan to sneak in sometime and do something to insert into my Friday timsheet which reads Client 1 News; Client 2 News; Client 3 News for four whole hours. One electronic two hardcopy and could've been done in 1.5hrs if I could calm down.
Chalk it up to experience. It gets easier. The more times you're a failure, the better you deal with it. Gosh, I'm such a pre-madonna. School-- and my stardom therewithin-- ill-prepared me for life. (Only now I agree with my elders, who while astonished thought I was wasting my time.) As did life in the country as a the daughter of a Baptist preacher. There are so many things I will do different with my children.
On that note, drinking Soooo.... much less. Good for weight-loss. Good for productivity. Good for children. Not trying yet. I'll definitely completely stop before I try to get pregnant. You should know, that, I've run out of multi-vitamins (constantly low on Fe and Ca), and I will replace them with something that has 100% Folic acid-- just in case. You need to prep like two-three months BEFORE you decide. What can it hurt?
What-- am I on my THIRD glass of white wine now? The kitchen floor is drying. We've made and frozen burger patties. Yes, I'll eat one. There!
Working on laundry. I put the sheets in at lunch so we'd have to make progress before bed. I should do as much house-cleaning as I can before bed. Oh... but panic makes me want to c.r.a.s.h....
found out I'll be at home alone during vacation-- after SO MUCH planning
decided to drink
That sums up Wednesday. Thursday, I didn't drink. Friday, I made two consecutive stupid mistakes with our most sensitive client. The sort of mistakes that are seen by 400 people at their leisure (twice) around the globe. What do you do? C'est la vie. Hell come Tuesday.
So the blackberry patch was bush-hogged (sp?)... Trying to think of something to cook for my hungry baby.
Backtrack: So we decided not to spend money on vacation, which is the sensible thing to do, but then Alex went off and scheduled work appointments-- in the morning and afternoon. Just quick ones... but it's decidedly un-vacationlike. I'll be cleaning the house or working in the yard; I know. We'd do it anyway, but at least we'd be together.
By the way, see me Tina Ignatiev on Facebook.com for updated pix of the yard-- which is fuckin fantabulous. Well, on the most-improved scale anyhoo.
It's Friday. We ran out and got the quality beef at a good price before it was sold out. Then I went back to work, salvaged the situation, and came home to .. what? that thing I do but do less than my mother (thank God). And I have Alex. I spent most of the afternoon in a daze, and plan to sneak in sometime and do something to insert into my Friday timsheet which reads Client 1 News; Client 2 News; Client 3 News for four whole hours. One electronic two hardcopy and could've been done in 1.5hrs if I could calm down.
Chalk it up to experience. It gets easier. The more times you're a failure, the better you deal with it. Gosh, I'm such a pre-madonna. School-- and my stardom therewithin-- ill-prepared me for life. (Only now I agree with my elders, who while astonished thought I was wasting my time.) As did life in the country as a the daughter of a Baptist preacher. There are so many things I will do different with my children.
On that note, drinking Soooo.... much less. Good for weight-loss. Good for productivity. Good for children. Not trying yet. I'll definitely completely stop before I try to get pregnant. You should know, that, I've run out of multi-vitamins (constantly low on Fe and Ca), and I will replace them with something that has 100% Folic acid-- just in case. You need to prep like two-three months BEFORE you decide. What can it hurt?
What-- am I on my THIRD glass of white wine now? The kitchen floor is drying. We've made and frozen burger patties. Yes, I'll eat one. There!
Working on laundry. I put the sheets in at lunch so we'd have to make progress before bed. I should do as much house-cleaning as I can before bed. Oh... but panic makes me want to c.r.a.s.h....
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Neo-Baptists
May. 20th, 2009 | 12:42 pm
mood: 
chipper
Today is my fourth day of sobriety. I think the last time that I was sober for four consecutive 24hr periods was November 2007.
I don't feel like I want to drink. I actually want to do other things tonight: strength-training, blackberry picking, yard work, shower, hulu-watching with Alex. I don't know why, but I always want to spend time with Alex on his fast days. I really really hate that originally I was disgusted by the amount of time that he spent at his computer-- even eating all his meals there-- and now it's rubbing off. I have thought about what and how much I will drink this weekend. I always set limits and rarely stick to them.
Anyway, now that my brain is unpickling, I find an old personality: a thinker, bitter and cynical, who moves fast in everything-- is productive and aware. It's hard to believe that it's been two years since graduation. I'm still not ready to talk to people-- new or otherwise-- or make friends in realtime. I don't know if I'll ever want to do that... I wonder who my children will play with.
I was just thinking at lunch that there is a hole in my argument about the power of free will. The exciting case studies I've heard about (i.e. comatose patients' brain wrinkles flatten out, tragedy victim's brain reorganizes so that functions from the lost/damaged area now work from other areas) are all responses to biological change. That's still one step away from saying that genetic and environmental impact on a person's personality/abilities can be overcome by sheer will. I maintain that Biologists are ignoring the self. I guess that's psychology... but where they meet! NEUROSCIENCE! That's where the cool sh!t is, man.
They'll figure it out. I don't think I've ever had an original idea. Everything I think, I find that someone else thinks. That's honest, but I still feel like everything and anything is available to me. I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me; God is the all-powerful creator of the universe; man was made in God's image. Gosh, I'm like some neo-Baptist. If I develop followers, you should shoot me.
I'm going to start co-posting on LJ. It would probably be a more appropriate medium than a dieting site. ;)
I don't feel like I want to drink. I actually want to do other things tonight: strength-training, blackberry picking, yard work, shower, hulu-watching with Alex. I don't know why, but I always want to spend time with Alex on his fast days. I really really hate that originally I was disgusted by the amount of time that he spent at his computer-- even eating all his meals there-- and now it's rubbing off. I have thought about what and how much I will drink this weekend. I always set limits and rarely stick to them.
Anyway, now that my brain is unpickling, I find an old personality: a thinker, bitter and cynical, who moves fast in everything-- is productive and aware. It's hard to believe that it's been two years since graduation. I'm still not ready to talk to people-- new or otherwise-- or make friends in realtime. I don't know if I'll ever want to do that... I wonder who my children will play with.
I was just thinking at lunch that there is a hole in my argument about the power of free will. The exciting case studies I've heard about (i.e. comatose patients' brain wrinkles flatten out, tragedy victim's brain reorganizes so that functions from the lost/damaged area now work from other areas) are all responses to biological change. That's still one step away from saying that genetic and environmental impact on a person's personality/abilities can be overcome by sheer will. I maintain that Biologists are ignoring the self. I guess that's psychology... but where they meet! NEUROSCIENCE! That's where the cool sh!t is, man.
They'll figure it out. I don't think I've ever had an original idea. Everything I think, I find that someone else thinks. That's honest, but I still feel like everything and anything is available to me. I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me; God is the all-powerful creator of the universe; man was made in God's image. Gosh, I'm like some neo-Baptist. If I develop followers, you should shoot me.
I'm going to start co-posting on LJ. It would probably be a more appropriate medium than a dieting site. ;)
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Bookkeeping
Apr. 18th, 2009 | 09:47 am
mood: accomplished
--------------FINANCIAL REPORT>>
GENERAL: So far this year, we've spent $392.72 on alcohol and $228.54 on cleaning and home improvement. We have $8,421.85 in the checking account whereas last year we had $220.78 in the checking account. Last year, though, we also had $2,804.05 in emergency savings and $5,953.74 dedicated to the wedding for a total of $8,978.74 in the bank, or $500 more than now.
LONG-TERM HEALTH: We have $695 in the savings can and have re-paid my March 2007 hospital bill in full. We anticipate depleting the car loan and a business loan this fiscal year but will re-evaluate our debt in the Fall, taking holiday travel into consideration. We have begun tithing, and I am paying a tithe on all past income that I have not previously tithed on.
MEMBER ANALYSIS: My YTD Net Pay is $7,058.26, and we have more than that in the bank account. That means that my husband is paying for everything. His YTD Net Pay is $10,000. Historically, his income centers on the beginning of the year so it is important to build a savings fund which we will start in earnest by May. I will suggest it be the whole of my income until it is necessary to use those funds to pay regular bills, and I anticipate making $25k which is 20% over my goal. Alex has a goal this year of $30,000.
CONCLUSION: We have almost recovered from the expense of the wedding, which roughly equals my income from summer 06 to summer 07 ($13k). As debts are repaid, we will use funds previously devoted to those payments to "overpay" other monthly bills until we are debt-free.
GENERAL: So far this year, we've spent $392.72 on alcohol and $228.54 on cleaning and home improvement. We have $8,421.85 in the checking account whereas last year we had $220.78 in the checking account. Last year, though, we also had $2,804.05 in emergency savings and $5,953.74 dedicated to the wedding for a total of $8,978.74 in the bank, or $500 more than now.
LONG-TERM HEALTH: We have $695 in the savings can and have re-paid my March 2007 hospital bill in full. We anticipate depleting the car loan and a business loan this fiscal year but will re-evaluate our debt in the Fall, taking holiday travel into consideration. We have begun tithing, and I am paying a tithe on all past income that I have not previously tithed on.
MEMBER ANALYSIS: My YTD Net Pay is $7,058.26, and we have more than that in the bank account. That means that my husband is paying for everything. His YTD Net Pay is $10,000. Historically, his income centers on the beginning of the year so it is important to build a savings fund which we will start in earnest by May. I will suggest it be the whole of my income until it is necessary to use those funds to pay regular bills, and I anticipate making $25k which is 20% over my goal. Alex has a goal this year of $30,000.
CONCLUSION: We have almost recovered from the expense of the wedding, which roughly equals my income from summer 06 to summer 07 ($13k). As debts are repaid, we will use funds previously devoted to those payments to "overpay" other monthly bills until we are debt-free.
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Shameless Ad from Sparkpeople
Apr. 8th, 2009 | 06:10 am
mood: awake
SparkPeople Sponsors help keep the site free!
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Technical Assistance
Apr. 6th, 2009 | 04:31 pm
Is there any program that will automatically hyperlink certain phrases after you type them? For example, every time I type "MRPA conference" or "GMIC Code of Conduct" I'd like it hyperlinked. It gets tiresome typing them in several times a day. Of course, I'm using it in Outlook 07, but could I create the e-mail elsewhere and paste over?
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$$$$ Contract Web Labor or Clerical? Stevie?
Mar. 20th, 2009 | 07:31 am
mood: 
drained
I have a conference call at 9APST = 11ACST so response would be appreciated soon. Since I won't be able to check this at work, you can reach me at (888) 450-2098 or info@greenmeetings.info .
----------------------------------------
One of AMS's clients (www.greenmeetings.info) owns http://www.bluegreenmeetings.org/. They would like the information on the latter site put on the new site (with links indexed in the password-protected member section). Of course, they want to have consistent GMIC branding so the new site template would need to be used.
My solution is about 40 hours of cutting and pasting along with checking links in the BGM pages to BGM internal resources/images. I think AMS would be happy to contract this out if anyone wants to volunteer. I don't know if I can handle all the overtime, and I know I wouldn't enjoy it.
Is there another solution that would take less time? (of course you'd receive a higher hourly compensation, but GMIC or AMS would still save money) GMIC is paying $20/mo to host BGM. They would *really* love it if this information could be searchable rather than indexed. (There's a free Google dooo-hickey. I don't have time for this... I like to go home and shower periodically.) They would probably also pay for speed.
---------------------------------------
I have a conference call at 9A PST = 11A CST so response would be appreciated soon. Since I won't be able to check this at work, you can reach me at (888) 450-2098 or info@greenmeetings.info .
One of AMS's clients (www.greenmeetings.info) owns http://www.bluegreenmeetings.org/. They would like the information on the latter site put on the new site (with links indexed in the password-protected member section). Of course, they want to have consistent GMIC branding so the new site template would need to be used.
My solution is about 40 hours of cutting and pasting along with checking links in the BGM pages to BGM internal resources/images. I think AMS would be happy to contract this out if anyone wants to volunteer. I don't know if I can handle all the overtime, and I know I wouldn't enjoy it.
Is there another solution that would take less time? (of course you'd receive a higher hourly compensation, but GMIC or AMS would still save money) GMIC is paying $20/mo to host BGM. They would *really* love it if this information could be searchable rather than indexed. (There's a free Google dooo-hickey. I don't have time for this... I like to go home and shower periodically.) They would probably also pay for speed.
I have a conference call at 9A PST = 11A CST so response would be appreciated soon. Since I won't be able to check this at work, you can reach me at (888) 450-2098 or info@greenmeetings.info .
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Remember me?
Jan. 27th, 2009 | 04:58 pm
mood: depressed
Work hard. Clean the house. Lose weight. Drink less.
I can't say there's a single part of my life that I'm satisfied with (what was I thinking when I got married and skipped out of the educational system-- however deformed it may be?) but I also don't really care. I used to get so bent out of shape.. so much passion.
Well, vodka. It's like running a magnet over your motherboard. Will anything ever matter again? Am I fixable? Will I ever feel like fixing myself?
I don't really want to talk to people either. I can't enjoy people. I just want to cease.
I can't say there's a single part of my life that I'm satisfied with (what was I thinking when I got married and skipped out of the educational system-- however deformed it may be?) but I also don't really care. I used to get so bent out of shape.. so much passion.
Well, vodka. It's like running a magnet over your motherboard. Will anything ever matter again? Am I fixable? Will I ever feel like fixing myself?
I don't really want to talk to people either. I can't enjoy people. I just want to cease.
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FREE STUFF
Jan. 27th, 2009 | 04:50 pm
mood: hungry
The first seven people to respond to this post will get something made by me! My choice. For you.
This offer does have some restrictions and limitations:
- I make no guarantees that you will like what I make!
- What I create will be just for you.
- It'll be done this year. (Might be a bit.)
- You have no clue what it's going to be. It may be a story. It may be poetry. I may draw or paint something. I may bake you something and mail it to you. Who knows? Not you, that's for sure!
- I reserve the right to do something extremely strange.
The catch? Oh, the catch is that you have to repost!
This offer does have some restrictions and limitations:
- I make no guarantees that you will like what I make!
- What I create will be just for you.
- It'll be done this year. (Might be a bit.)
- You have no clue what it's going to be. It may be a story. It may be poetry. I may draw or paint something. I may bake you something and mail it to you. Who knows? Not you, that's for sure!
- I reserve the right to do something extremely strange.
The catch? Oh, the catch is that you have to repost!
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Alcohol and Weight Gain
Dec. 13th, 2008 | 02:27 pm
mood: depressed
I weigh six pounds more than I weighed on 10/5. That's a three pounds a month gain.
I biked to the bank and took recycling on my bike today. I made just enough Lenten sugar-free pancakes for hubby (AMSCIPIO 257cal), but had 1c. cream of wheat with 2T raisins for breakfast. I'm wolfing down maté since it's too cold to drink water. We walked to the library, and we'll go for 'a walk' later. Probably a 2.5mi circuit we've developed downtown.
The Art Walk is tonight. I have 'a complimentary drink' waiting on my at my boss's house, oodles of appetizers at downtown businesses-- and I used to do a lot of window shopping until I got married. He's a fan of sitting down in a bar. We also have a late-night birthday party for a middle-aged bachelor.
Here's my plan: Don't take the complimentary drink. Walk through the sculpture park with hubby, drop him off at the bar, walk home. Have a sensible dinner. Bike or walk to the party. Say hello, decline drinks. Leave hubby there for the rest of the party.
But, this seems like a lot of separation of me and hubby. He went to a dinner party all by himself last night. I don't want to waste a night! Not that it would be any fun if I did or did not drink, but alcohol is at least a diversion. Overall, hubby is being more healthy; he's lost weight. I, however, am not fairing as well. I feel like nothing more than a resolveless BLOB.
Check in tomorrow to see where I end up.
I biked to the bank and took recycling on my bike today. I made just enough Lenten sugar-free pancakes for hubby (AMSCIPIO 257cal), but had 1c. cream of wheat with 2T raisins for breakfast. I'm wolfing down maté since it's too cold to drink water. We walked to the library, and we'll go for 'a walk' later. Probably a 2.5mi circuit we've developed downtown.
The Art Walk is tonight. I have 'a complimentary drink' waiting on my at my boss's house, oodles of appetizers at downtown businesses-- and I used to do a lot of window shopping until I got married. He's a fan of sitting down in a bar. We also have a late-night birthday party for a middle-aged bachelor.
Here's my plan: Don't take the complimentary drink. Walk through the sculpture park with hubby, drop him off at the bar, walk home. Have a sensible dinner. Bike or walk to the party. Say hello, decline drinks. Leave hubby there for the rest of the party.
But, this seems like a lot of separation of me and hubby. He went to a dinner party all by himself last night. I don't want to waste a night! Not that it would be any fun if I did or did not drink, but alcohol is at least a diversion. Overall, hubby is being more healthy; he's lost weight. I, however, am not fairing as well. I feel like nothing more than a resolveless BLOB.
Check in tomorrow to see where I end up.
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Imbalanced Justice
Nov. 24th, 2008 | 03:54 am
In sixth grade math class, as students were coming in from a previous period, some big fat white girl with long dark hair said something mean to me--being that I was sitting to her left and she didn't want me to sit close to her. I had chosen front and center so I told her to shut up, although I knew better than to use that phrase. The teacher was in the hall watching students run about so that they wouldn't cause trouble.
She stood up, asked if I wanted to do something about it. I stood up. She pushed me. I pushed her back. She gave me a black eye. My first thought was that punches really do sound just like they do in cartoons.
The entire class scrambled to appear normal. I sat at the kiddie desk to the far right as our class was overfull. I tried not to cry. The teacher asked about my eye, if I needed to go to the nurse, because it was so red. Eventually the snickering started. She lost her patience and asked if anyone would tell her what was going on. Some 'good' kid stepped to the side ans whispered something to her.
Knowing I was soft, she took me outside first. I cried. The kids heard it. From the first, she was accusatory, "I didn't expect this from YOU, Tina." And I the one with a black eye. What a crime.
In the end, both my assailant and I got two days in in-school-detention. It was actually kind of a blast. My teachers sent all my work at the beginning of the day. I was done in twenty minutes and I colored-- until my guardian said it was a punishment so I couldn't. Then I read books-- and ran out of books to read. She also said I couldn't enjoy this, but conceded that I could read some science textbooks or magazines. Fine.
I also got it at home. I don't know if the bully did or not. So my teacher, my principal, and my parents ganged up on me to tread on my last bit of resistance, what little self and will I could hold at eleven years old. All the tears in the world were mine.
The other little girl, however, knew something that I had not yet grasped. That the justice dolled out by the authorities was imbalanced. She could punch me, and we'd both suffer-- I perhaps more because I had my reputation as a 'good' kid and my overbearing parents. She also knew something else-- that you've got to take care of yourself first.
This is something every parent knows. Every seat in the audience on graduation day is inhabited by a person who got where they are by taking action. They could not be adults if they let themselves get run over and whine to their boss or the President or whomever they perceive with control and power. Yet this is the way the shcool was run. STepping out of line-- regardless of cause or degree-- was punished. There is an equality to that. Commie nonsense. No wonder there is so much anger and violence.
Even being mostly non-violent, a Christian, someone tolerant to an extreme, if I had it to do over again, I would've lit into her with every ounce of my own. I'd still get in trouble, but I wouldn't have to deal with that bully again.
She stood up, asked if I wanted to do something about it. I stood up. She pushed me. I pushed her back. She gave me a black eye. My first thought was that punches really do sound just like they do in cartoons.
The entire class scrambled to appear normal. I sat at the kiddie desk to the far right as our class was overfull. I tried not to cry. The teacher asked about my eye, if I needed to go to the nurse, because it was so red. Eventually the snickering started. She lost her patience and asked if anyone would tell her what was going on. Some 'good' kid stepped to the side ans whispered something to her.
Knowing I was soft, she took me outside first. I cried. The kids heard it. From the first, she was accusatory, "I didn't expect this from YOU, Tina." And I the one with a black eye. What a crime.
In the end, both my assailant and I got two days in in-school-detention. It was actually kind of a blast. My teachers sent all my work at the beginning of the day. I was done in twenty minutes and I colored-- until my guardian said it was a punishment so I couldn't. Then I read books-- and ran out of books to read. She also said I couldn't enjoy this, but conceded that I could read some science textbooks or magazines. Fine.
I also got it at home. I don't know if the bully did or not. So my teacher, my principal, and my parents ganged up on me to tread on my last bit of resistance, what little self and will I could hold at eleven years old. All the tears in the world were mine.
The other little girl, however, knew something that I had not yet grasped. That the justice dolled out by the authorities was imbalanced. She could punch me, and we'd both suffer-- I perhaps more because I had my reputation as a 'good' kid and my overbearing parents. She also knew something else-- that you've got to take care of yourself first.
This is something every parent knows. Every seat in the audience on graduation day is inhabited by a person who got where they are by taking action. They could not be adults if they let themselves get run over and whine to their boss or the President or whomever they perceive with control and power. Yet this is the way the shcool was run. STepping out of line-- regardless of cause or degree-- was punished. There is an equality to that. Commie nonsense. No wonder there is so much anger and violence.
Even being mostly non-violent, a Christian, someone tolerant to an extreme, if I had it to do over again, I would've lit into her with every ounce of my own. I'd still get in trouble, but I wouldn't have to deal with that bully again.
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WEB DESIGN CONTRACT OPPORTUNITY
Nov. 20th, 2008 | 10:29 am
location: work
Association Management Systems
(888) 450-2098 Kelly Evans kevans@megagate.com
Is seeking contract labor starting at $25/hr to work on the American Therapeutic Recration Assocaition website. This has been edited in JoomLa. All the information is out there, but it is currently not navigable nor appealing. for example, click on About ATRA, then click on Leadershop Team. This doesn't take you to our Leadeship page. It just refreshes this list. This is super-confusing and very aggravating for our therapeutic rec people.
You will receive direction from AMS staff via e-mail. Preference is given to someone speedy (within 24hrs) edits as most direction will be generated from complaints received from ATRA members. Member satisfaction is greatly increased when they see prompt responses. You will not be asked to deal with memebrs at any time.
AMS has in the past bought a block of time (like a retainer). When we've used that time, we buy another block.
(888) 450-2098 Kelly Evans kevans@megagate.com
Is seeking contract labor starting at $25/hr to work on the American Therapeutic Recration Assocaition website. This has been edited in JoomLa. All the information is out there, but it is currently not navigable nor appealing. for example, click on About ATRA, then click on Leadershop Team. This doesn't take you to our Leadeship page. It just refreshes this list. This is super-confusing and very aggravating for our therapeutic rec people.
You will receive direction from AMS staff via e-mail. Preference is given to someone speedy (within 24hrs) edits as most direction will be generated from complaints received from ATRA members. Member satisfaction is greatly increased when they see prompt responses. You will not be asked to deal with memebrs at any time.
AMS has in the past bought a block of time (like a retainer). When we've used that time, we buy another block.